And you thought things couldnt get any crazier...

Hello my beautiful people!

So its just over 3 months since my father passed away. Tomorrow would have been my dads 76th birthday, had he been alive to celebrate it with us. He was a man I will marvel at and cherish in my heart for the rest of my existence.

In the last 3 months its been some kind of crazy. And you thought having a funeral for your dad 3 days before your best friends wedding was full on? Well it got even more wild and dangerous here. 3 days after the wedding my mum went in for a mammogram, 5 days later she was asked to come in to discuss their findings only to discover she had breast cancer. So they gave us a date for the surgery about two weeks later. Mum was hoping she had time to get her head together, but they called a few days later to move the surgery closer. They had gotten the pathology back and the cancer was aggressive... small but aggressive.

So she went into surgery and had a double mastectomy... one breast with cancer one without! They took both because we have a stupidly high number of cases of breast cancer in the family.  We don't know if we have the genes yet... so only then can we (my sister and i) make choices about our own health and long term physical well being.

What I found most amazing was that after having such a radical surgery she was home within 24 hours!!!! Seems crazy right? but its actually because people are more likely to heal in their home environment away from "Sick people" at hospital. She is immuno compromised so she could catch anything at the moment. So it makes sense... just seems weird! lol

So for the first 6 days we had nurses visit daily to check the drains, and eventually (and disturbingly to me) remove them. I don't do blood & bodily fluids well... and that was too much for this little princess to cope with. I was not born to be a doctor or a nurse! Kudos to those of you out there who are!!! You are an amazing group of people.

A HUGE thank you to all those amazing Doctors, surgeons, staff, nurses (both at the hospital and visiting), physios and councilors at the hospital who were just absolutely amazing with my mum and with a pair of very concerned "kids".

My sister and I learned so much about ourselves and about our friends and family. Thank you to all those people who sent us notes, emails, texts, cards, flowers, food, support, love, thinking of you's... they made so much of a difference to us. We are so grateful for all of you! Thank you!

Mums health and recovery has not been simple, by any means. Ive learned some things I never knew before existed with breast cancer "Cording" & "seromas" just to name a few.  But we have got the amazing news that she is cancer free and does not need Chemo or Radio therapy. We are so blessed that they found the cancer so early and were able to remove it before it did some serious systemic damage. Really we are totally grateful... after all I couldn't have lost my mum and my dad in the same year. I think that might literally have killed me.

And through it all my mum has been grieving for my dad. But you wouldn't believe how strong she is. Sure she cried a lot(and continues to on occasion) , but you would too if you had lost your husband and survived breast cancer all in the same month. She is stronger than she thinks she is and I am so proud of everything she has achieved and done for us through all of it. I love you mum! So does Vandra! We are proud of you for just keeping on going... because sometimes that is the hardest part!

One of my favorite quotes, and forgive me for not knowing who said it, but it seems adequate here...
"Women are like tea bags. You don't know how strong they are until you put them in hot water."

 I have had some added complications too with my own health because about now you were expecting this story to be over... after all how much can one family bare?
 *Be warned gentlemen & Squeamish ladies this is a bit gynecological... so i totally understand if you want to skip this next paragraph entirely...*

So the surgery I had last year, to burn some of the Endometriosis off my uterus, was then a success but now my own uterus has decided to fight back. in other words they are pretty sure the Endometriosis is back (WAY SOONER than expected) less than 10 months after the surgery. So the doctor has told me that I need to think about having kids sooner rather than later, because in 5 years or after, with the deterioration of my uterus and the damage the Endometriosis is doing, I might not be able to have kids. So that sucks a bit because I don't even have a boyfriend, let alone a fiance or husband. And I always hoped I would not have kids on my own. My family have been beautiful and have said that if i want to have babies on my own they would support me! Thank you my beautiful people! I'm still not sure a lifetime of commitment (to a baby/child/teen/etc) would be the best way to cure a gynecological issue.

But i am clinging to the hope that my best friend has been beating me with... she has told me of a work colleague who had the same condition and was told the same thing at around the same age as i am now (28)  and who is now 38 and just having a baby! Thanks Tanya... it means so much that you keep giving me hope! Hope... its amazing how it can make such a difference!!!

But wait there is more... we have had 5 funerals in the 3 months. Some anticipated, some not. I have decided I am now getting pretty good at the whole funeral thing. I just hate that I have to loose acquaintances, friends and loved ones to prove I can survive these sometimes funny, sometimes sad, sometimes tragic events. I send great love to everyone who has lost someone dear to them... no matter when. It is not an easy thing.... my deepest condolences.

Would you believe that one of the things that has been getting me through this is the love and support  I have received from this community, and the positive actions people have taken and the small kindnesses we have witnessed through these last few months.

My sister who took on a role as an administrator on the Facebook page whilst I was on my Round the World adventure, has been so supportive in everything I have done. From the first day I decided to try make this project work (in its original form) to now and, I am sure, well into the future, she has encouraged and supported me. Even whilst we have both been grieving and struggling and doing our best to just keep moving forward. Thank you beautiful!

My brother-in-law who has been a quietly strong rock that we have all leaned on at one stage or another this last few months. He looks after his wife (my sister) with love and compassion. And yet he grieves too. After all he was mates with my dad for the 17 years that Vandra and her hubby have been together. And probably a few years before that too. Thanks for all the support Glen. Your energy and enthusiasm with your extracurricular commitments, your kindness to mum, and your quiet words of encouragement really make a difference to me.

Oh the kids. The bringers of light, love and endless joy (ok... and the occasional tantrum)! From my niece being able to walk around with a spoon on her nose (which is Soooooo Epic!!!!) to my nephew calling me to tell me he had his Plate out this afternoon. I love being there for you, and I am so proud of the awesome little people you have become. I love you so much! and thanks for telling me you love me too, even when it might not be "Cool"! Thanks you beautiful ones!!!!


Our family seems to have gone through hell this year. We have been broken into a million pieces and scattered to the wind, only to find that our friends and some family have been catching our fragile pieces and slowly putting us back together. It might not be exactly the same as it was before. But somehow with all the glue and scotch tape used to put us back together we are coming out stronger than before. And that is a blessing.

Thank you to everyone... whether you read this tonight or tomorrow or in 50 years time. YOU are totally and utterly appreciated!!!!!!!

Oh and as for kindnesses... they might not be as exciting as some, after all i am earning my keep as a carer at the moment, but i am still doing them. Every single day! As promised! I hope you are acting with kindness too! :)

with great love to you all...
Luv Daena xxxx

A wedding & a funeral...

Hi everyone, 

So I've just had one of the busiest and most challenging couple of weeks of my life. Filled with the highest highs and the lowest lows! 

I have been talking for a while about preparing for hens nights, kitchen teas & my best friends wedding. So I have been very busy preparing all of that, and making sure that each event came off without a hitch! Which, thankfully, it did! :)

(Minion themed Hens party photo)

I have also been busy fulfilling roles as sister and "the best Aunty ever" for my sister & nieces birthdays also! 

But there was one thing I had not prepared myself for...

My dad, Victor passed away on the 19th of Feb after a long and complicated illness with Cerebral Amyloid Angiopathy! His death was both tragedy and blessing! He doesn't suffer any more, but we all miss him dearly! 

(Photo of the flower the staff laid on my dads chest after he passed away... Such a beautiful & simple gesture.. A wonderfully touching kindness)

Dad died exactly between my sister and nieces birthdays (who are exactly a week a part) and a week and a half before my best friend Tanya's wedding to her now husband Isaac! So not only were we coming to terms with the loss of my dad but we still had a 6 year olds birthday and a wedding to get through too! And then chuck in a funeral and you can begin to understand what my life was like last week! 

Dads funeral was beautiful! It was everything he asked for and we could have hoped for! So, I just want to say thank you to everyone who made it to dads funeral! It made a huge difference to see people we haven't seen in years, people who have come from all over the state & those who have been there for us through it all! No matter who you are and how often we see you now, thank you for making dads funeral such a special event for us and a beautiful way to celebrate the life of an extraordinary man!

Also, Thank you to all those people who sent cards, condolences, love and flowers to us this last couple of weeks! It has helped my family & I in our grief, to know others are thinking of and sending their love to us! 

I know I am still coming to terms with the fact my dad isn't just down the road for me to chat to when I want. And I keep waiting for it to really hit me... But I guess having the wedding to focus on after the funeral was what I needed because I haven't had a chance yet to wallow in my sorrow. 

For those who wanted to know how Tanya & Isaacs wedding went... It was amazing! Tanya got me in a dress, high-heels, makeup & fancy hair, which I have to say is an achievement in itself! :) 

(Photo curtesy of: Kye Ellen)

I was completely overwhelmed with the love they have for each other & their friends & family! And the love that they & their friends & family bestowed on me! I gave my obligatory maid of honour speech and after a few jokes, shared a bit about who these amazing people are for me...their love, support & generosity!  And Included what they did for me during dads funeral, where both of them played a supportive role! And doing this all just days before their own wedding! I am so blessed to have these two people in my life! 

(Photo curtesy of Kye Ellen)

I wish Mr & Mrs Mead all the happiness in the world! 

(Photo Curtesy of Linda H ) 

Please excuse me whilst I may not post for a while... It does not mean I have given up my kindnesses! In fact I see their importance now, so much more than before! I am, after all, the legacy of my father, & he was such an amazing man! Dad & my mum taught me about kindness, generosity & compassion and I have a deep need & responsibility to share those things with others! 

I hope you are all well! I send my love to you all! Thanks for hanging in there with my blog! 

Much love, 

Daena x

January 28, 2012

Hello hello, 

Well the 28th was an amazing day for me! I got so much done! Most of my work was related to the upcoming Kitchen Tea party for my best friend! 

I went to 3 second hand shops looking for tea pots, cups & saucers, sugar bowls, milk jugs, and pretty plates for the "English garden party morning tea in the high tea style" that I have been preparing for in two weeks time (or there abouts)! 

So I went to the 3 charity op-shops & bought something at each one! Ending up with an amazing array of kitchen tea party wares for $50... Check this out.... 

Or in more detail...

Mum taught me how to stack & pack four cups & saucers into each other so they don't take up as much space! Very grateful for that lesson! Thanks mum!!! 

I also donated a box of books to the first charity shop we went to because they had been sitting in the boot of the car for about a week! :) 

There is still so much to do for these parties... But I just love having the ability to share something! Sadly I can't share much of my preparation about the hens party because I want all those details to be a surprise for my best friend! After all I know she reads this blog from time to time! Hi TJ! :) xxx 

What is the most exciting thing you have found at an op-shop/thrift store/2nd hand shop? 

Luv Daena

January 27, 2014

Hey lovelies, 

on the 27th I got to work preparing & planning more stuff for my best friends kitchen tea & hens party. Spent an hour and a half having a planning meeting with the mother of the bride. 

This is a photo of my book of secrets for my best friends pre-wedding parties! :) 

I did some cleaning at my sisters house, because they are away. I also fed my niece & nephews fish & chickens! :) 

I also helped another friend by drying dishes after dinner & desert at her house! 

I hope you are all doing well! 

Much love, 

Daena x

A few days later... Kindnesses not forgotten!

Hey my lovely people, 

Sorry I haven't posted for a few days! There has been a few problems with me uploading posts and such from my phone so I'll work to updating these things in the next week! I really am enjoying keeping up to date with my kindnesses because it's a good record/diary for me & a wonderful record for everyone else! :) 

I love this because it shows me just how simple kindness can be! I hope it continues to help inspire you too! 

Much love to you all! Thank you for your love & support! :) 

Luv Daena x

January 26, 2014 -Australia Day

G'Day Mates!!!! 

This is the traditional Aussie greeting on a day like today! It is Australia Day, and it is hot & thankfully an early breeze came in tonight cooling us all off a bit! It is a day to remember our country has a past that is both brutal and sometimes beautiful! This land of ours is harsh and unforgiving, yet there is beauty everywhere you look! Today is a day to remember how blessed we are to live here, with health, wealth & happiness! 

Honouring our indigenous past is important too! Conflict between the groups of Traditional Owners & colonists started the day colonists arrived and yet still continues today in different ways! We have so much to learn from the Indigenous community, after all they lived here for centuries without impacting the environment like we do! They had enough food, fuel & safe places to live without pilliging this land of ours so brutally! They swam in the ocean yet knew it was the home of those creatures that swam there! They learnt how to live around & survive sharks, spiders, all manner of Australian creepy crawlies, and treat them all with the respect they deserve! 

I know that modern culture is not this simple! Many indigenous communities have forgotten their past, or been forced to forget! It is not perfect! Nor are those of us who are decendants of white settlers! We need to honour Indigenous Australians as the incredible people they were, are & will be again! We cannot change the past but we can look forward with hope for the future! 

So back to usual... today's kindnesses were simple but a little bit Australian! :) for example...Taking over the BBQ duties whilst the party host had to greet his visitors, cooking sausages & procuring a bottle opener for friends, hugging people I hadn't seen in a while! Meeting & spending time with strangers, getting to know them & share little bits of myself with them, & making people laugh! 

I enjoyed the fireworks too! It's a huge display we have here in Perth every year! Fireworks in Western Australia are illegal unless by a pyrotechnics company who have to have licences, so it's always amazing to see what these people come up with! :)  

Happy Australia Day! 

Luv Daena x

January 25, 2014

Hey beautiful people, 

Saturday the 25th was the first day mum was allowed out and about! After spending the afternoon Friday out of bed, she was just gently swaying in the breeze rather than hanging on to everything with dear life! Friday she was able to sit & help me by sticking down stickers and envelopes for the hens night & kitchen tea invites! Which saved me some time! :) 

So after a good day on Friday, Saturday she was excited to get out of the house! She had pre booked an all day scrap booking event, and was desperate to go! (I'm not the only craft family member)! So I drove her and stayed with her all day, and was able to participate too! :) 

For kindnesses I bought lunch for mum, my sister & myself (my sister is just as crafty)! And I helped others by picking up their stuff, as a lot of stuff seemed to end up on the floor! Me with young legs and all! :) i helped several ladies use a new paper cutting tool called a Cricut (these have been around for ages but are new to us!)

I acted as mums legs (she still wobbled like a sailor just off his ship after a 3 month adventure). 

I tried to help mum out as best I could and help those around me too! And it meant we all had a good fun time! :)

I didn't take photos of what I did... Silly me! So I'll have to post them another time! :)

Have a wonderful day & have fun! 

Luv Daena x